Friday, February 28, 2014


Am I crazy for keeping track of this or will I be happy I did this in a month? It remains to be seen...

Rosewater and glycerin throughout the day
TML #2, this time made with doTerra oils.
Vitamin E oil
doTerra Melaleuca oil
DigestZen in the morning and evening (4 drops total)
doTerra Peppermint -- one drop, rubbed into hands, inhaled, then rubbed across back of neck for pain and migraine.

Water cups x 8 with lemon oil (6 drops)
Water with DDR oil x2 (16 drops total)
2 drops Frankincense 
Small pot of SmoothMove, per mom and Breana's suggestion. :) 
All pills except colon cleansers. Total: 19 pills/capsules.

(but with some replacements due to food restrictions).  
Salad: Carrot + apple + red onion + spring greens + homemade dressing 
Cacao nib chia pudding, unsweetened
Unsulfured & unsweetened dried mango

[update & recipe]: praise & pudding!

From 7AM to 5:30PM, today was awful. Worse than yesterday (and yesterday was worse than the days before it). 

But, for some reason, around 5:30PM, something kicked in, and now I feel a little better! My head is clear, my brain is working, my energy level is where it should be, and I am being productive! I am getting school done! I am so happy to have an opportunity to get things done, praise the Lord. 

Time for a celebratory recipe. :) 


I was told that dark chocolate would be extremely beneficial for me, but finding dark chocolate that fits within my restrictions (no salt, no sweeteners other than maple syrup, etc) have made that as feasible as stopping a train with some toenail shavings. SO, on an excellent errand-afternoon with Suzannah, we found cacao nibs and organic chia seeds at a price that was quite pleasant. Having read a number of intuitive chia seed pudding recipes before, I gave it a shot. The result is beyond delicious (especially if you're patient enough to let it sit a while). 
Cheers to success! 

- 30ish mls / 2 tbsp of raw chia seeds
- Cacao nibs to your liking (I think I did ~15mls / 1 tbsp)
- 1.5 c. Coconut milk
I used 1 cup initially, and then added more later just because it needed it. 
- Natural sweetener to taste (between 1 tsp and 1 tbsp).
i.e., maple syrup or agave or honey or coconut sugar or whatever else floats your boat.

1. Mix the wet and try ingredients together and let them sit for ten minutes before you stir it up again. The reason is just to avoid a 'crust' of floating chia seeds on the top that don't absorb the milk. 

2. After stirring the mixture a second time, add your sweetener if you plan on it. If you're using coconut milk that is already sweetened, then you won't need it (typically). Or you can add coconut flakes, dried mango, or fresh mint. Go nuts. :) 
(Oh, actually, nuts would also be delicious).

3. Let it sit until the chia seeds are plump. (Between 1 and 2 hours). 

And voilĂ ! 

Oats are on the "No" list right now, so I ditch the sweetener for a more breakfast appropriate replacement to my favorite raw overnight-oatmeal (because all cooked oatmeal that has not been made by my Oma is nasty; Oma makes cooked oatmeal magically delicious). 

Well, as I told my mom, I am now officially the health nut that everyone always assumed I was. Your expectations have been fulfilled! :)


Though the angry surges roll 
On my tempest-driven soul, 
I am peaceful, for I know, 
Wildly though the winds may blow, 
I’ve an anchor safe and sure, 
That can evermore endure. 

And it holds, my anchor holds: 
Blow your wildest, then, O gale, 
On my bark so small and frail; 
By His grace I shall not fail, 
For my anchor holds, my anchor holds. 

Hymn by William C. Martin, 1902. 

symptoms: week 1

Debbie suggested that I track my symptoms so that I can see when even small improvements are made. Otherwise, these small improvements might be lost in the sea of everything-that-still-isn't-fixed. I think it's a great idea! I'll revisit the list at the end of each week to see how things are going. With everything else that has to be tracked, I think this is better suited to that format. :) 

Here's the current list: 

Chronic fatigue from morning to early evening
On/off nausea
Serious brain fog
Back pain
Neck pain
Wrist cramping, L & R
Stomach pain
Chronic constipation
 Bloated / swollen: face, neck, tummy

- L, R ears
- forehead
- L, R cheeks
- L, R eyelids
- under the chin
- L, R jawbone
- L, R, F, B of neck
- L, R, F of shoulders + along arm pit line
- top of back
- chest
- torso
- L, R inner thigh 
- behind R knee 
- L, R arms, including wrist

Thursday, February 27, 2014


Rosewater and glycerin throughout the day
Homemade raw shea butter lotion ("TML", i.e. Tom's magical lotion)
Vitamin E oil

Water with lemon oil (3 drops)
2 drops Frankincense 

1 Bowl of --> Broth + raw carrots + brown rice pasta + Non-GMO vegan "cheese" + liquid soy protein + coconut fat
(but with some replacements due to food restrictions).  

I meant to track the number of water cups today... Tomorrow, maybe. I have a good system to follow. ;)

squeaky clean(sing)

The doTerra oils arrived today!
The timing was perfect, because today has been rough. 
I woke up feeling a thousand times worse than I have been this past week, 
and this week has not been pretty. 
Why it ebbs and flows like this has yet to be discovered (at least by me)
but I am hopeful that today marks the beginning of the road towards progress.

While I have been chipper to everyone who has asked about it thus far, I have
finally admitted to inward frustration and sadness. But that is largely due to being miserable, 
not due to the discovery of the cause and probable solution. 

And I will spare you the gnarly in-between-ness that occurs between 
the original question and the coherent thought at the end of the answer (sheepish 
apologies & gratitude to those of you who have experienced that stage no matter
the know who you are), but the idea of physical cleanings 
has me meditating on spiritual cleansing. 

O God of mercy, hear my call, 
My loads of guilt remove; 
Break down this separating wall, 
That bars me from my Love.

Give me the presence of thy grace, 
Then my rejoicing tongue 
Shall speak aloud thy righteousness, 
And make thy praise my song.

No blood of goats nor heifers slain, 
For sin could e'er atone; 
The death of Christ shall still remain 
Sufficient and alone.

A soul oppressed with sin's desert, 
My God will ne'er despise; 
A humble groan, a broken heart, 
Is our best sacrifice.

Hymn by Isaac Watts, written 1719.

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

honestly: the genesis

Tl;dr -- I lack the genetic material to produce a necessary enzyme --> perfect host for yeast & fungus --> deteriorating DNA, adrenals, thyroid, intense fatigue, brain fog, et cetera -->  have to flush, rebuild, and heal my system. 


Life is lovely and goes smoothly, generally. School is wonderful, my husband is more than wonderful, and living in Ashburn is also wonderful. But, honestly, the past few months have less than wonderful regarding my health. It has been pretty miserable, actually. 

Tom pushed me to do the tests that revealed the true root behind the problem. He is beyond faithful and encouraging and supportive and loving. He is a mighty treasure, given to me by Greatest of treasures. 

Here is the long version of the test results, taken from an email I wrote to my Oma (with a few edits). 


I am genetically unable to process carbohydrates. My body doesn't have the genetic information that it needs in order to produce those enzymes. Thus... I am the ideal host for yeast and fungus. 

When yeast and fungus reproduce, they create mycotoxins. Specifically, they produce a mycotoxin called "aflatoxin". Mycotoxins slowly erode DNA, organs, glands... everything. It isn't a disease, but its effect is like many degenerative diseases. My digestive system is defunct, more or less (though we're working on changing that), so instead of getting rid of the yeast and fungus and their resulting mycotoxins through the normal means (i.e. bowel movements), my body, desperately needing to dispose of the waste, has been trying to get rid of it through my skin. Hence... eczema. 

My eczema began when I started eating solid foods on my own... Because when mom nursed me (thank you for doing that, mom) she was processing those materials for me with the enzymes that her body knows how to create.

It's a good thing that we didn't have kids right away. The Holy Spirit put that in our hearts before we were even married and now we know why. Although mycotoxins often render fertility a challenge at best, if we had been able to get pregnant, I would have passed on damaged DNA, along with a ton of mycotoxins, leading to a slew of health problems that shouldn't surface in an infant, not to mention the other problems that arise from being conceived and nourished in a body that is operating as if it has a degenerative disease.  

Mycotoxins can also be passed through intimate contact, so I have given Tom mycotoxins. Both of us have to cleanse our bodies of them, otherwise we will just pass them back and forth. So, we are working to kill off the yeast and fungus, heal my digestive track, restore my deteriorating adrenals / thyroid, and get rid of the mycotoxins. There is even a way to help heal my damaged DNA (although we obviously can't insert information that isn't there, so I'll be taking enzymes for the rest of my life). 

In addition to that, I have flat worms, assorted parasites, a bacterial infection, and my saliva tested positive for the presence of manmade biotoxins (whoop whoop). 

It will be a bit of a long road, but we have solutions in place. They are supposed to arrive today and tomorrow, assuming the weather hasn't prevented anything. The materials for the new regimens arrived on Thursday. My diet is obviously a bit of part of the healing process, so I am officially high maintenance, again! Whew, flashbacks to years 9-15 of my life when my eczema was at its worst. 

Tom is extremely supportive and loving and encouraging and selfless.  He is making me lotion from scratch so that I am only using the stuff that helps (it is actually accidentally saving us money too, whoo!). My family is also being extraordinary. Mom set aside plain kale and let me use/eat a whole can of coconut milk so that I could join them for Corrie's birthday dinner.  

Because this has an issue for my whole life, I have been told to expect a longer healing process. That's depressing. I'd almost rather have not known (I certainly never solicited that information; thanks Doc!). 

Part of my really just wants to ugly cry and be done with it. But ugly crying will make my face hurt worse, haha! :) Oh darn. I am sure the mailman will appreciate that I didn't engage in any emotionally stressful activities to further degrade my external aesthetic. ;) 

I'm overwhelmed and a little sad. But, in the end, I'm happy that we know what's going on and I'm content in that. It was more frustrating when we had no idea and I just kept getting worse no matter what we did. I look like a burn victim right now, and I feel like one too. With God's grace and mercy, Tom's help and support, and the love from both him and my family (plus some crazy life changes and food habits and routines) I will heal and be all better eventually.


So, this blog (I hate that word, by the way, blah!) will be my way of tracking progress. I am basically making you my accountability buddies... insofar as it is always embarrassing to slack off on something when you have told everyone that you're going to do it. :)

I will be using this as: 

a. a creative platform 

b. a food journal

c. a means of periodic updates

And there you go. Nothing fancy. Primarily in place so that don't slack off... Because, as days become consistent and routines are finally developed, slacking off will be easy to do. 

I am encouraged and excited about the path forward and the knowledge that every step is in God's control. 

From Spurgeon's Morning and Evening readings... 
(June 30, evening reading).

"Ah Lord God, behold, Thou hast made the heaven and the earth by thy great power and stretched out arm, and there is nothing too hard for Thee."—Jeremiah 32:17. 

At the very time when the Chaldeans surrounded Jerusalem, and when the sword, famine and pestilence had desolated the land, Jeremiah was commanded by God to purchase a field, and have the deed of transfer legally sealed and witnessed. This was a strange purchase for a rational man to make. Prudence could not justify it, for it was buying with scarcely a probability that the person purchasing could ever enjoy the possession. But it was enough for Jeremiah that his God had bidden him, for well he knew that God will be justified of all His children. He reasoned thus: "Ah, Lord God! Thou canst make this plot of ground of use to me; Thou canst rid this land of these oppressors; Thou canst make me yet sit under my vine and my fig-tree in the heritage which I have bought; for Thou didst make the heavens and the earth, and there is nothing too hard for Thee." This gave a majesty to the early saints, that they dared to do at God's command things which carnal reason would condemn. Whether it be a Noah who is to build a ship on dry land, an Abraham who is to offer up his only son, or a Moses who is to despise the treasures of Egypt, or a Joshua who is to besiege Jericho seven days, using no weapons but the blasts of rams' horns, they all act upon God's command, contrary to the dictates of carnal reason; and the Lord gives them a rich reward as the result of their obedient faith. Would to God we had in the religion of these modern times a more potent infusion of this heroic faith in God. If we would venture more upon the naked promise of God, we should enter a world of wonders to which as yet we are strangers. Let Jeremiah's place of confidence be ours—nothing is too hard for the God that created the heavens and the earth.